Let Me Go
by Jenns.Fiction
Summary: Post-MJ. Peeta heads home to continue the healing process with Katniss, only to find that she's come to terms with her fate. Written from a prompt on my writing tumblr. WARNING: Major character death.


**Disclaimer: I do not claim any ownership over The Hunger Games whatsoever. I do not gain anything, profit or otherwise, from writing in this universe.**

**WARNING: Major character death. Please do not continue if this is a touchy subject for you to read.**

Please see below for author's notes**.**

* * *

It was a good day.

The rebuilding in District 12 was progressing as it should, and more people were returning every day. Peeta enjoyed the extra work that his bakery was receiving because it meant that life as he knew it would be getting back to normal.

Well, as normal as it could be for someone who had been through as much as he had been.

There were days that were harder than others; the ones where he ended up clenching his shaking fists and feeling drops of sweat roll down the back of his neck and over his back were the worst. The only thing that helped him through his episodes was the one constant he had in his life now.

Katniss.

Since his return to the district, Peeta admitted to himself that his motivation to heal was Katniss. She had lived a life even harder than his own, and he wanted to show her that if he could do it, if he could get better, then so could she.

They could help make each other whole again.

He could see the improvements she was making. The nightmares seemed to be fading, and she was slowly opening up to him again.

Today would mark six months that they started their lives over. They had let go of their pasts and moved on.

Peeta couldn't wait to celebrate that small milestone with Katniss.

He gathered up his things and locked up the doors to the bakery before heading back to the old Victor's Village. The walk wasn't long, and he could feel his steps getting faster as he neared the house he shared with her.

As soon as he entered through the front door, he called out, "Katniss? Are you home?"

When he didn't receive an instant response, he shrugged to himself and headed for the kitchen to begin dinner.

And that's when he found a single sheet of paper with his name written near the top.

* * *

Peeta picked up the note that Katniss had left for him and read it one more time.

_Peeta,_

_You know how bad I am with words. There's a reason you always spoke for both of us. You also know how hard it is for me to look at you when I have to tell you something you won't want to hear._

_So I'm writing to you instead._

_I never thought that a handful of nightlock berries would bring us to this point. I only wanted to protect you – that's always been my goal. Ever since you saved me with the bread, I somehow knew I would never be able to let you go._

_So I'm asking you to let me go instead._

_I thought it would be better after the war was over. I thought I would feel that it would have been worth it._

_You were always worth it, Peeta._

_I'm not so sure about me._

_At night, when I close my eyes, I see the faces of people who will never get to see another day in their lives._

_Rue, who will never sing to the mockingjays again._

_Finnick, who will never know how much his son looks just like him._

_Prim, who will never grow up to be a nurse._

_Thresh, Marvel, Glimmer, Mags, Wiress, Chaff, Cato, Clove, Gloss, Cashmere, Brutus…so many names, Peeta._

_So many people who died because of me._

_I have to take my place with them._

_Please don't follow me. I know we said we'd protect each other, but this is one thing you can't protect me from._

_I'm sorry._

_I'm sorry you lost your family because of me._

_I'm sorry you were tortured by Snow because of me._

_I'm sorry you were hurt because of my lies and deceit._

_But most of all, Peeta…_

_I'm sorry I never told you how much I love you._

_I'm sorry it took me so long to figure it out. I'm sorry for all the times you thought I didn't love you, because I did. I'm sorry my head and my heart never worked together to tell you what you need to know._

_I love you._

_I hope you still love me enough to let me go._

_Katniss_

With tears streaming down his own face, Peeta looked over at his own note that he had written just minutes ago, this one addressed to Haymitch, their mentor, who had tried so hard to keep them alive through two Hunger Games and a war.

He hoped his words would give the older man some semblance of comfort.

Picking up the sealed envelope and length of rope sitting next to it on the table, Peeta stood from his chair and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, Katniss," he murmured to himself, taking one last glance out the window towards the forest, where he knew she had gone to find her favorite tree.

"I love you, but I can't let you go."

* * *

_This story was initially written for my darling friend so-amazing-here, who gave me a drabble prompt of "__Katniss commits suicide after MJ and Peeta is despondent__" on my fiction Tumblr. After the overwhelming response there, I decided to write an extended version, which is what you see here._

_Many thanks to so-amazing-here for the awesome prompt and to madefrommemories for her input and "LOVE/HATE" for this story; you two are wonderful._

_Please visit me on Tumblr to find exclusive stories and sneak peeks into my upcoming stories._

_Thanks for reading, and please leave a review!_


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